Ol McBonzi's farm.

Written by , on 2024-06-08, genre fetish

Bonzi VS Kiwifarms.
Once upon a time there was a nasty little website called Kiwi Farms and there were several members that were the most annoying including ‘Goat Sneed’ (who had the stupidest username ever because sneed is not even a real word), Overcooked Bacon (who had the second stupidest username), Debt Collector (who wasn’t even a real debt collector), Pukeyboy (who sounded like a rejected superhero sidekick) among others. They spent a little too much time berating and vilifying people on the autism spectrum and thought that every autistic person was like Chris Chan.

One day the group of idiots were in their ‘lair’ (which was in actuality their orgy dungeon where they all circle-jerked together and jerked off to everyone else’s pain!) when a cloud of supernatural purple smoke materialized and took on the form of a purple gorilla. ‘Ah, the final people for me to teach a lesson. And it looks like these idiots are perfect for the punishment.’ ‘Is this some kind of weird revenge-fic? And who are you to call us idiots, you’re a weird OC.’

‘An OC? An OC? I am Bonzi, the all knowing master of the internet and the lord and master of the online world in general. I am the lord and master of the internet, show some respect!’ Bonzi responded, he looked over at the members and sneered. ‘So a talking monkey is going to punish us?’ ‘A talking monkey? A talking monkey? I am an ape! Do I look like a monkey to you, huh?’

He looked over at each member….’Overcooked Bacon? What a stupid username! What gave you the idea to come up with that nickname, did you mom make you bacon for breakfast that was a bit overcooked?’ ‘Hey!’ ‘You know it’s true, but hey you guys obviously have inspired me to come up with your punishment.’

An accordion materialized in Bonzi’s hands as he began to sing a song mocking Overcooked Bacon…’Ol McBonzi had a farm, E-I-E-I-O! And on that farm he had a pig, E-I-E-I-O!’ ‘What is going on here, why are you singing this?’ OB looked at his hands and screamed in horror as they hardened and turned black, morphing into a pair of half hoof-like hands as his clothing slowly strained and began to rip in several ways. ‘With a strain strain here and a strain there, there a strain, there a strain, here a strain, everywhere a strain strain! Now you are going to join Ol McBonzi’s farm, E-I-E-I-O!’

The changes slowly caused him to gain a lot of weight as his clothing slowly ripped apart, his belly and torso fattening and swelling as his legs also swelled, his shoes slowly bursting apart to reveal his feet which were growing and slowly becoming half hoof-like as he stumbled backwards.

’No way, i’m turning into a freaking pig!’ ‘When you put bacon in your username, you asked for this to happen!’ OB tried to beg for forgiveness only for Bonzi to laugh at him, he thought that the sight of this pathetic person who obviously did something wrong acting like he should be spared - was the funniest thing ever.

A curly tail like that of a pig sprouted out of his rear which fattened up, Bonzi continued to mock him in the form of a song, pushing his face in a puddle of mud and making him act like a pig for his amusement. His ears slowly shifted to become porcine in appearance as his nose swelled, his face fattening up as it pushed out into a half pig-like snout.

‘Turn our friend back right now or I will do something bad to you!’ Pukeyboy exclaimed. ‘Or you will do what, exactly? Make a scathing forum post about me with screencaps and everything? Too bad, because it’s your turn to join the farm. Ol McBonzi had a farm, E-I-E-I-Oooo!’

Bonzi turned his attention towards Pukey as anything and everything OB held dear diminished along with OB’s memories, all he could remember was that he was a pig-monster that was part of the purple gorilla’s growing farm. Pukey looked like he was trying to threaten him. ‘Your threats are so cute, but they have no effect on me. And now Ol McBonzi needs a cow!’

Pukey attempted to hit Bonzi only to find himself falling down as the purple gorilla mocked him in song, white fur with black spots slowly coated his body as his ratty shirt slowly began to strain due to his chest slowly inflating, he felt his chest and gasped in horror as two breasts slowly forced themselves out from the skin on it, the breasts swelled and swelled and filled with milk.

His shirt slowly ripped to reveal his new breasts which were growing and producing milk, causing him to lactate and spill milk on his pants. ‘I am lactating? But I am a guy, and I am not even pregnant!’ ‘And that is not the only part of you that will be giving milk, my dear boy. Because you guys loooooove cows so much, I am giving all of you a gift, by making this fool here into one!’

He gasped as his arms thickened and his hands slowly shifted to become half hoof-like, his stomach gurgled loudly as it swelled and fattened, his whole body fattening and being covered with those hairs. ‘And look at that, my growing cow-woman has a lovely growing body! Which is perfect for you, my dear bovine beauty. I never liked your regular form anyway, too much of an edgelord.’

Pukey’s pants slowly strained and ripped apart as his rear fattened up and a tail like that of a cow slowly emerged, his privates shifting to the feminine variant as the zipper on his pants broke because of an udder that was forcing itself through and with a rip his pants burst open completely to allow his growing udder to push out and fill with milk, he felt his udder and then gasped as he lactated all over the floor. ‘What the heck is going on, why are you turning me into a cow?’ ‘Because you love cows so much, you are going to be one. Besides, I heard your fellow forum members love cows too, so you are going to be a favorite.’

His feet shifted to become half hoof-like as two horns slowly grew out of the top of his head,his ears shifted to become bovine-like as his face slowly pushed out into a half bovine muzzle, his features and appearance becoming more feminine as he did so. ‘And now ol McBonzi has a cow and he has a pig, E-I-E-I-O! You should be lucky that Crichax is no longer here because if he still was you know I would have literally made him my bitch, literally. He liked Jade Harley I can tell, and since he likes dog-women, he’d likely like to be a dog-woman himself.’

Debt Collector stood there…’Now how about we fix you? Since both of your friends are now anthropomorphic farm animals, I am going to need someone to help run my farm.’ Bonzi smirked as he pointed at him and got a devious look on his face, thinking of the image of D.C as a mature gorilla farmer.

Which of course made D.C suddenly start itching uncontrollably as his skin slowly turned from normal color to greyish and black fur slowly crept up on his arms and hands, his body slowly bulked up, gaining a healthy mix of fat and muscle as his clothing ripped apart, a silver saddle of fur grew on his back that went all the way down to his thighs.

In addition to this skin aged a little bit while his back and shoulders broadened, his torn clothes slowly morphing into a pair of farmer overalls as his feet took on the appearance of being hand-like, his hair grew longer and his features shifted to look ape-like as his teeth sharpened, he was now an anthropomorphic male gorilla like Bonzi except he was much older.

Bonzi turned his attention to Goat Sneed as he sang another verse of the mocking song, this time he sang it in a different style, Sneed attempted to block out the sounds only to have his hands slowly shift into being half hoof-like hands as hairs slowly coated his body.

The hairs coated all over his body as his feet slowly shifted to become akin to hooves and a tail much like that of a goat popped out of his rear, two long horns grew out of the top of his head as his body bulked out and deformed. ‘Stop this, turn my friends back to normal.’ ‘Too late for that I am afraid.’ He cried for forgiveness but only got laughed at as his face pushed into a muzzle resembling that of goat’s. ‘There we go. Now we have a proper farm. Ol McBonzi now has a farm, EI, EI, EI, Oooooo!

The purple gorilla smirked as he teleported them into a special part of his home dimension that was made to resemble a farmyard and they were transported to their own pens to be taken care of by D.C. ‘There we go, all better. My job is done now.’

‘Can we get back to normal?’ ‘Sadly, this is your new fate, welcome to the farm, motherfuckers!’ Bonzi laughed as he used his magic to transport himself to the farm part of his home dimension and he began to take care of his new farm animal-people, the farm would now be their home form now on.

And thus his mission was over, and he had defeated all the nasty people on the internet, he was ready to reign over the rest as the lord and master of the internet and he had taught them a lesson. Remember, don’t be an ass on the internet or it will come back to haunt you.

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